VAYETZE 5778
LOVE AND OUR INNER RESOURCES
November 23, 2017
5 Kislev 5778
The story of Jacob meeting Rachel at the well lacks connecting tissue; Jacob arrives at the community to seek out uncle Laban who is to provide him with refuge until such time as the anger of his brother Esau has abated. He turns to the three shepherds seated at the well and inquires whether they know his uncle Laban. They answer in the affirmative and point out his daughter, Rachel, approaching with her flock of sheep.
The Torah records that upon seeing Rachel, Jacob immediately removes the heavy stone covering the well's opening. It was an amazing feat since it always required a cooperative effort of many shepherds. Yet once Jacob set his eyes on Rachel, he was able to summon the physical strength to singlehandedly roll away a very heavy stone.
To my mind the Torah here describes the extraordinarily energizing effect of love. For Jacob it was love at first sight, and he somehow senses a similar reaction from Rachel. This love then infuses him with the strength he demonstrated at the well. What the Torah may be intimating is that deep love can be an extraordinary source of strength and a catalyst for men and women to achieve extraordinary success.
Even as the biblical Jacob had his Rachel, the Talmud Rabbi Akiba had his Rachel. Her unconditional love inspired the unlettered shepherd to begin the study of Torah. Akiba responds to this love and diligently applies himself to his studies to emerge as the sage of his generation and the master teacher with many disciples. At a critical moment in his life he tells the students, "I am what I am because of her, even as you are." Rachel's unconditional devotion to Akiba, her many sacrifices on his behalf, willingness to even deny her most basic necessities enabled Akiba to develop into one of the most authentic voices in our tradition.
This is often true for many couples. The mutual commitment of life partners to one another and, their deep love for each other enables both to accomplish much in life. Commitment of each partner to the other, the deep love between them, the willingness to sacrifice for one another are often factors in enabling each to excel in life.
This is also no less true of the power of parental love that enables children to access their hidden resources to set and to achieve goals in their lives. At times such unconditional love can characterize a sibling relationship as well.
There is also the power of a positive relationship between teacher and student. For 45 years Bob Hurley coached Jersey City's St. Anthony High School basketball team that successfully competed against the best high school basketball teams to win 22 state championships and eight undefeated seasons.
These gifted teen athletes performed at such high levels not merely because of their talent but also due to Hurley's deep devotion to them. They knew he cared about each of them as an individual. They knew he was committed to get them to college and to respected and fulfilling careers. This infectious love inspired them to work harder and to summon hidden resources that enabled them to excel not only on the basketball court but also in life. Did he succeed with every one of his players? Hardly. Yet due to him, many lives were shaped and saved.
At this Thanksgiving season may we celebrate our love for the people in our lives that continues to help them tap into their inner resources to fulfill their dreams and achieve their goals. Let us be thankful for the blessing of the love of dear ones that enables us to become more than we ever thought possible.
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From the holy city of Jerusalem my best wishes for a Shabbat Shalom u'Mevorach, a Shabbat have peace and blessing and a very happy Thanksgiving.
Rabbi Arnold M Goodman
TOLDOT 5778
THE LENTIL AND THE MUSTARD SEED
November 16, 2017
22 Cheshvan 5778
The Torah recounts how a famished and weary Esau, returning home following a long day hunting game in the field, finds Jacob preparing a thick and savory lentil soup. Being a man of few words, Esau asks (demands?) that his brother give him a bowl of this tasty dish. Jacob agrees but only on condition that Esau sells him his birthright. Immediate gratification was far more important to Esau than the privileges associated with the birthright. He thus agrees to the term of the sale and sits down to gorge himself with the meal prepared by Jacob.
The Midrash notes that lentils were served to mourners upon their return from the burial of a loved one. Hence, it conjectures that this particular Esau-Jacob interaction occurred on the day that their grandfather, Abraham, was buried. Jacob, a dutiful son, was thus preparing this traditional mourner's dish for his father, Isaac.
Why lentils? One reason the Midrash offers is that the round lentil symbolizes that mourning ultimately "rolls" and intrudes into every life. This truth is also brought home in the famous story of the mustard seed. A woman mourning the death of a dear one approaches a holy man asking if there is a way to restore her loved one to life. She is told that her wish will be fulfilled provided that, within a year, she return with a mustard seed taken from a home that has never experienced the grief of mourning. The woman travels throughout the world, knocking on doors of homes large and small. She is welcomed everywhere and interacts with a cross-section of humanity, only to discover that there is no home, no family, no individual that has been spared the pain of bereavement.
Thus, both the lentil and the mustard seed are symbols of universal sadness and sorrow. The lentil, however, is not only a metaphor for loss, it is also a reminder that joy and happiness will also roll into our homes and our lives.
Traditional strictures that govern mourning, such as not attending concerts, theater and cinema, as well as reciting Kaddish, terminate after a year. The first yahrzeit thus marks the rolling away of the lentil of mourning to welcome the lentil of joy. This new lentil directs us to a verse of the Shabbat hymn, L'cha Dodi, "Arise, emerge from your desolate state/ too long have you dwelled in a valley of tears."
This Shabbat and the following Monday, our family will observe the first yahrzeit following Rae's death. It's been a hard year, and her death has put an end to the 70 years she and I lovingly and happily shared with one another. Yet, with the family we built together, I am heartened and strengthened by the expectation, God willing, of the births of two great grandchildren and the prospect of many future joyous celebrations.
It would be good to be spared grief and bereavement. Life is such, however, that both simcha and sorrow will punctuate our days. When faced with loss, our tradition consoles us with the uplifting and reassuring words of the Psalmist, "Weeping may tarry for the night but joy comes in the morning." Joy and sorrow both come from God, and, hopefully, this perspective will aid us to withstand life's vicissitudes as well as to appreciate and celebrate its many joys.
Yes, weeping may tarry for the evening but, hopefully, joy awaits us all in the morning.
Yitgadal v'Yitkadash Shmai Rabbah…
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From the holy city of Jerusalem, my best wishes for a Shabbat Shalom u'Mevorach, a Shabbat of peace and blessing.
Rabbi Arnold M Goodman
