A Moment of Torah with Rabbi Neil Sandler

When all of our children were still at home, the highlight of Shabbat dinner for me was the privilege to offer each of our children Birkat Kohanim, the Priestly Blessing, and give each of them a kiss. It was a time to slow down, focus on the blessings Susan and I enjoyed in our children and invoke God's presence. It was a moment of love. The end of childhood and adolescence has not changed my practice. My children are adults now. I don't often see them and their spouses (oh, yes, and Remi!) on Shabbat evening. But when we are together, I still bless these 30+ year old children. In that moment we connect to an earlier time in our family's life, and we savor it.

As a rabbi, when I would place my hands on the bowed head of a Bar/Bat Mitzvah and offer the Priestly Blessing, I also felt something special at the end of my charge. I felt that I was the conduit for blessings "aimed" at that young adult from the Holy One and from loved ones and friends. I always felt it to be a privilege to be the representative of God and the community.

The words of the Priestly Blessing evoke feelings, but they also have meaning. Rabbi Shai Held in his book, The Heart of Torah, cites the interpretation of Rabbi Naftali Zvi Yehudah Berlin regarding the first line of the Blessing, "May God bless you and protect you." Rabbi Berlin draws our attention to the fact that the two verbs in this sentence are stated in the second person – singular.

"May God bless you—" the recipient of the blessing should feel that it addresses him/her personally.

"and protect you—May God protect you, lest the very blessing you receive turn into a stumbling block."

"…lest the very blessing you receive turn into a stumbling block." I never thought about that possibility, but Rabbi Berlin shares a potential truth. Many commentators interpret the first half of this blessing as referring to material success. Yes, it can be a wonderful blessing if used wisely. But material success can also alter one's values and relationships with other people. Good health is a tremendous blessing, but sometimes this blessing can be mitigated when a person feels he/she is invincible and does something foolish and harmful. Engagement in the community can be a blessing for many people, but what happens when a sense of balance is lost, and one does not pay sufficient attention to his/her own family?

Rabbi Berlin shared a wise, but somewhat subtle, thought in his interpretation of the first line of the Priestly Blessing. Those whom we bless should enjoy a blessing that is just right for them. But those who receive such blessings should be mindful that the blessing remain just that—a blessing that benefits the individual and others—and not become an unintended curse.